They left the upper at five in the morning, so all told they’d had a solid four hours. It was a good four hours. Mary was messed up by the substances but she was so relaxed that she lost her inhibitions. This pleased Bill no end because he was free to do to her not only what she told him to but whatever he wanted to add on as well.

Somewhere around three AM they found their way into the bed.

“You know we ain’t gonna sleep,” Mary had said.

“No, we probably won’t,” Bill said. “ It’s all right cause I got uppers to get us through the day.”

“More drugs.”

“Why? Don’t you feel good?”

“I feel okay. Just a little scared.”

“I always feel scared, or at least jittery.”

“Me too, mostly,” said Mary. “I always been feeling that way, leastwise since I been alone, and that’s a long time now.”

“I’ve felt that way since my mother died,” said Bill, “and it’s gotten much worse since I got busted.”

Mary took him in her arms and held him tight. This started him off again, and her too, and something happened neither one of them had expected but which was beyond either of their expectations. Bill kissed her differently than ever before. He started with a soft kiss on the lips, then several more soft kisses around her lips, especially in the corners of her mouth. She kissed back, deep kisses, emotional kisses, long, passionate kisses, moaning all the while with pleasure.

They were tucked in under the electric blanket, naked, tight in each other’s arms. They made love, soft, sweet, creamy love, something deeper than either of them anticipated or maybe wanted. Mary moaned in his ear, and for his part, Bill lost himself in her. He wasn’t lost in sexual heat; he was lost in her.

In the shower they washed each other and played happily. Then they dried each other and went back under the electric blanket.


“Goddamn it’s cold,” Mary said as they got into Bill’s car.

“Shit yeah,” Bill said. He had given her a Black Beauty and taken two for himself. He’d told her if she needed another one to let him know.

They stopped at Mary’s house first so Mary could peek in on her kids. She found them all asleep and left a note on the table that she’d be at work. Back in the car, she reached over and kissed Bill on the lips. The heater was blasting and it was toasty warm.

“I hate you,” she said.

“I hate you too.”

“I didn’t want to feel nothing for you. But you couldn’t leave me alone, could you?”

“Maybe I didn’t want to.”

“You got a goddamn fiancé.”

“I do. And I’m gonna marry her. But that don’t mean I can’t…” Bill held himself back from what almost slipped out of his lips.

“Goddamn you. Just goddamn you.”

Pick up a copy of my published works here: Books by Peter Weiss.